2. Friendship And Memories

by The Dirty Latte

Cleaning out my closet always results in finding some misplaced items or long forgotten documents. This morning as I picked up a photo album, a stream of old photos came pouring out onto my lap. At a time when I’m rethinking relationships and dealing with homesickness, this is either what I really needed to see or didn’t need to see at all.

A best friend, someone you can grow to call family, is a really special thing. You meet a stranger and somehow they become so close to you that they know you better than yourself. I’ve had this a few times in my life and I am happy to say I haven’t lost those friends, although we’ve had trouble keeping close over the years as we’ve grown I know that they will always have an incredibly special place in my heart, and I hope they feel the same way about me.

I was fifteen when this particular friend and I became close. We were both silly and young, thinking that the end of a relationship were going to be the complete end of life. We consoled each other in tears by her locker, and I had no idea she would become one of the most important people in my life. Months later, as I stood in the driveway bawling my eyes out after a breakup, she was the one who talked me down from near hysteria. She supported me through a roller coaster of a relationship, assuring me that if he & I loved each other we could make it work. When I got pregnant at seventeen, we became closer than ever. She was there when I had my daughter, and a witness when my husband & I eloped. In turn, I was there for her with loud music and dark car rides though many broken hearts and bad days. I was as excited for her first pregnancy ultrasound as I was for my own.

Eight years, hundreds of photos and memories later I wonder when it all changed as I sit looking at these photos of a person I thought I would share everything with through my entire life. Now I’m over a thousand miles away, and while there’s still photos of us hanging on my wall and sitting in my lap, we’ve got from talking more than once a day to texting once or twice a week. Over the course of a month, our lives took completely different paths and I’m stuck wondering where I went wrong to not keep that friendship closer, or how such a deep connection has become so thin.

I hope that over time, we can get back the friendship that I so desperately miss, and I wonder how to teach my five year old daughter how to truly appreciate friendships in a way that took me so many years to understand. One of my biggest wishes for her is to have the kind of friendship where they stand by each other through life’s many obstacles, a friendship like the one I had. I just have to have hope that she won’t make her mother’s mistake and let that friendship fall apart.